


Don't Pretend It's Such A Mystery (Think About The Place Where You First Met Me)

by kycantina



Series: I See How This Is Gonna Go (Touch Me And You'll Never Be Alone) [1]
Category: The Penumbra Podcast
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Clairvoyance, M/M, Other, but instead I decided to set the suitcase on fire, implied reincarnation?, there's a lot to unpack here, there's more where this came from
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-08
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:41:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22609468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kycantina/pseuds/kycantina
Summary: Peter Nureyev is the first to leave this time, the first to drag himself out of bed and deftly down the fire escape.Nureyev's clairvoyant, but that doesn't stop him from making bad decisions.
Relationships: Peter Nureyev/Juno Steel
Series: I See How This Is Gonna Go (Touch Me And You'll Never Be Alone) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1626826
Comments: 8
Kudos: 43





	Don't Pretend It's Such A Mystery (Think About The Place Where You First Met Me)

Peter Nureyev is the first to leave this time, the first to drag himself out of bed and deftly down the fire escape. He'd seen it just before he'd fallen asleep: flashes of headlights, Juno's tires screeching as he pulls out, away. He's not sure how he'll live with himself now, paralyzed in bed, Steel silent but still awake next to him. He's not sure how he'll live with himself later, either calling Juno back to bed or sprinting down the highway, whistling for Ruby. 

Nureyev wishes he had a notebook right now (his were all but destroyed), something to sketch out all of their possibilities. He'd seen a few in passing: golden bands and Juno in white, blood spilling from Nureyev's mouth, with shackles at his wrists. In some they become a permanent fixture, domestic and sugar-coated. In some, he's bound to watch Juno walk out, or die, or lose one of the few scraps of himself he's got left. 

Peter runs the numbers the same way he's been doing since receiving Dark Matters file folder  _ J. Steel _ , fingers twitching in what Juno will think is sleep. Reality is more unkind, so Nureyev weighs his options. If he lets Juno leave now his chances of seeing him again rest on Hyperion City's tendency to ruin people. If he lets Juno go now, any number of things could happen. Steel was no thief and no ghost, he wouldn't haunt Peter's memory or future, he wouldn't send dahlias and roses. If he lets Juno Steel break his heart now, Peter Nureyev is almost certain he'd never get it back. Maybe Juno is more of a thief than Nureyev gives him credit for.

Juno is awake and watching, he can practically hear his detective's gears spinning. Nureyev can't help but disturb his peace, stir Juno from his reverie. He reaches up to trace the curves of Juno's cheekbones, his delicate Cupid's bow, and the way he seems to glow in the neon lights perking through the hotel blinds. He catches Juno's attention for what will be the final time, gets to be the object of his affection, if only for a moment. 

"What are you doing?" His voice is too  _ focused _ , Juno sounds so awake that Peter nearly pulls back.

"Memorizing." Nureyev is quieter than he normally is with Juno, pads of his thumbs against a smattering of Juno's scars. Each detail, for further consideration. If this is their final moments, Peter wants to do this right, to get enough Steel for the rest of his (admittedly shortened) life, to breathe in Juno's sweat and feel the crunch of his curls. 

Juno stiffens under his touch, and Nureyev knows he’ll never forget the moment when Juno pulls away. “What’s there to memorize?” 

He feels his heart breaking as he reaches out for Juno, who’s fighting to keep casual. “Everything, detective.” Nureyev pauses to take a carefully timed breath. “You’re… everything.” 

He holds Juno in the dark for hours, both of them breathing too heavily to be really asleep. Peter waits until the sky lightens to the color of his bruises, until Juno starts to get shifty under him. He stills when Nureyev presses his forehead to the curve of his shoulder. “You know, I can’t be good for you, detective.”  _ I can’t even be good for myself _ . “Call me a fool if you like, Juno, but it’s for the best.” Their last kiss is cold and permanent, a stone weight on Juno’s shoulder as Nureyev pulls back, biting the bullet before his detective can even think about pulling the trigger. “You know who to call.” 

His dirty, blood soaked boots are slick against the mesh of the fire escape, and for once, he can see why Juno chooses Hyperion, in every reality, in each of their dead ends and fallouts. It’s so damn easy to disappear.


End file.
